Parenting Paradoxes

I read something recently that struck me:

• It's useful for parents to have a consistent parenting philosophy, but also to be flexible and able to adapt to the uniqueness of any given situation.

• It's important for parents to pass on family traditions and values, but also to allow children to be unique individuals.

• Encouraging children to express their thoughts and feelings increases the chances that they'll stand up to you.

• Children move toward independence and dependence at the same time.

• Parents can be delighted and enthused at the new things their kids can do, and simultaneously feel the loss of their child's younger self.

• When you cultivate independence in your kids, they sometimes become independent in a way that leaves you out.

• Parents can love parenting one minute, and hate it the next.

• Your biting, hitting, pushing child can actually be evolving into an empathetic, caring individual.

• We're preparing children to live in a world that we can't possibly imagine.

-- Taken from Becoming the Parent You Want To Be; Laura Davis and Janis Keyser

Putting some of these together, you could say that the key paradox of parenting is that you are raising your children to not need you by the time they are grown. That's immensely hard to do.